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I am woman – don’t hear me cry…

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Dec. 11 2013, Published 1:00 a.m. ET

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I think can safely say with 100% certainty, that during your career the you will find that some unbelievably frustrating idiot that you work with will make you cry.

Now I’m not one who cries often, I am pretty tough and good at masking my emotions in public but nothing gets me to cry faster than anger. It is my trigger and it sucks becauseit seems that clients, colleagues, and bat-S*** crazy NYC cab drivers are hell bent on trying to make me angry!

It is inevitable and I’m sorry to also break this to you; it will occur more than once.

The key ladies however, is to handle it as a woman; with dignity and grace.

With that out of the way, the real question is not “how can I ensure that I do not cry”, but rather “what do I do when I feel the tears welling up because it is “socially unacceptable” to punch this person in the face?”. The main thing to remember is that unless someone has died we MUST NOT, under any circumstances, let people we work with see us cry. The sad fact is that your colleagues will treat you differently if they see you cry at work.

So with all these obstacles in life and the fact I must not let anyone see us cry I have come up the best places to escape to so you can have a damn good private cry. Key to this is a good location. Your natural question now is “What make a good cry location?”

4 things you may want to consider: It must be…

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  • Somewhere you can’t get caught
  • Somewhere if you do get caught the likelihood of the person knowing who you are is limited
  • Somewhere sound proof if possible (unless you are one of those silent crying freaks of nature)
  • Somewhere comfortable (or at least comfortable enough….no one likes to cry in discomfort)

So with that list in mind, I selected my personal top locations to cry in order of most desirable location:

1. The ladies room two floors above or below your office
2. The changing room in the nearest Ann Taylor (they have the nicest shop assistants)
3. Your car (just make sure you are not in eyesight of colleagues out for a walk or coffee)
4. The nearest coffee shop (this one can be tricky if your company has a “coffee culture” and survives on caffeine)
5. The ladies room on your floor (this is for silent criers but also is a good spot for a 5 minute cat-nap…no one wants to know what is taking you so long in the stall)
6. An unused meeting room in your office

AND if none of those work, fake sickness and get home.

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